I'm baaaaaaaccck....

Finally home and well rested from my summer holiday to Croatia. Although I had a lovely time, there were a couple snags in my trip.
While laying on the beach and trying to decompress, I found nothing took me out of kick-back mode like unwanted male attention. I'd like to preface this by saying I'm truly flattered and appreciative whenever any member of the opposite sex approaches with a little chit chat. However, if my fancy has not been caught, I don't mince words, body language or make any attempt to ante up my lack of enthusiasm to ensure no mixed signals are being sent.
As every other not so easy to impress woman can relate to; finding ways to repel men becomes routine. What I thought would be my meal ticket was to pretend like I'm homeless (i.e. don't shower and extend my sleeping attire into 'day wear'). Sadly, this thought to be genius idea does not work, as I still get approached, just usually not by the pick of the litter.
Then I though...what turns me off? DUMB MEN! So, I tried to decrease the appearance of my intelligence. BAD IDEA. Bad, bad, bad idea. Apparently - fluffy, unmotivated, bubble headed women are to men like law practicing, Mercedes driving men are to us. Hmmmm... I'll just act like I'm really smart! Yeah... that... didn't... really... work.
What else can I do? I give up! And just like that, when I stopped pining for answers, it came to me. Actually, it had been within my reach all along - my mother!
I notices when my sister and I were out on our own, we were constantly pestered by croatia's finest. However, when in my mothers company, they all seemed to stay at arms length. I tell you, no smirky attitude, body odor or low IQ can come close to warding off men like being in the presence of my mommy. Like a shepherd, she protects us sheep from the wolves.
When I think about it, it's really just pay back. When my mom started dating after her divorce, the second she brought potential suitors over to the house to meet my sister and I, they would hit the road. Oh... the beauty of life and how things come around full circle! Thanks mom, you're better than garlic :)